A Sad and Searching Heart Finds Jesus!

Written By Claire Hall


I have an amazing story to share with each of you.  It is a true account of how I came to know Jesus Christ, who is now the Lord of my life.


In the past, God seemed very distant to me. Somehow I perceived that He was all-powerful, but I didn’t know if He loved me.  I learned very little about God from the churches I attended while growing up.  I had noticed that different churches had different beliefs about God and how they worshipped Him.  I had read some pages from the Bible one time, but I didn’t really comprehend it.


The Bible was not used in our home or in all the churches I went to.  I grew up in the Philippines’ until age twelve and the one thing that my family practiced was the canas, which was a ritual of butchering pigs to sacrifice to the spirit of the dead.  There were times when they would dig up the bones and I remember having nightmares from seeing these.  I was afraid a lot.


Life to me was empty.  Everyday was just another day.  My parents were both very busy with their workload and there were times when we kids would be by ourselves at home.  There really wasn’t much teaching or training given to us.   My life was unstable.  My self-worth was very low and I had no goals or direction for my life.  We didn’t have a close family so I didn’t receive a lot of love or support.  I actually had a false idea of what love really meant.  


I made a disaster out of my life.  I made many poor choices that led to many problems.  I began to get frustrated, bitter and angry.  Because I was a selfish person, I did what I wanted to do.  Having money, going shopping, and going to movie theatres was my life.  My security was my boyfriend.


Life began to get harder as my problems got worse.  I had unmet expectations that I couldn’t handles and I became an emotional wreck!  I considered committing suicide many times.  I was just enduring life …day by day.  I really thought my main problem was that I didn’t finish college, because I could have had a higher paying job.  I thought that would make everything better.


One day my sister-in-law invited me to the New Testament Baptist Church.  At first, I was uncomfortable, but this was where I heard about the Gospel.  I kept going to church because God spoke to me there.  He was working on my heart.  I was still stubborn.  I had a cynical attitude toward people and especially toward my husband.   


I didn’t know if God could save me, but one day He opened my eyes and heart. I began to understand. It was almost as if some mighty, bright light came into me.  I began to see my sins the way that God sees them.  I realized that my real problem was a sin issue .  I had been concentrating on my husband’s faults and sins….instead of my own.  I began to see my sins as grotesque in God’s sight.  I began to see that a “Christian” was more than just a nice person who went to church a lot.  


I remember the day when I decided that I didn’t want to live in sin anymore.  One particular service, as I listened to the preaching, I knew for sure that God was talking to me about my sin and my need of salvation!   On December 12, 1999, I repented of my sin and placed all my faith and trust in Jesus Christ alone, to cleanse me from my sin.  


The Bible explains the conditions to salvation:  “The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken spirit; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.”  Psalm 34:18 


That was me!


“But without faith it is impossible to please him.  For he that cometh to God must believe that he 
is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him.”  Hebrews 11:6


I believed His promises!


“And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them 
out of my hand.  My Father which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s hand.”  John 10:28-29


I now know Jesus Christ as my personal Saviour.  I have fellowship with Him in prayer. 


I love growing in grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ.  As I read His Word daily, go to church on Sunday and hear preaching, I am spiritually fed.   I have a new life with Jesus Christ.  He has given me peace that this world could never give me! 


My life is now filled with love and joy.  I have security and stability because of God and His Word.  The Holy Spirit is teaching me how to be a Godly wife and mom and I no longer live in a state of fear like I used to.
Through my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, I am learning to love my husband unconditionally.  Christ is the center of our home and we’re trying to bring our children up in a Godly direction.  I want to live a life with blessings to pass down to my children instead of family curses.  I don’t want to waste time with sin anymore!


II Corinthians 5:17  “Therefore if any man be in Christ, He is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.”  


I now have a desire to reach others for Christ.  I found NEW LIFE in Jesus and you can too!  Nothing in this world can ever give any soul eternal life.  If you were to die today, do you have that blessed hope of going home to heaven?  If you want to be saved…you must do it God’s way through repentance and faith.


Luke 13:3 “I tell you , nay; but except ye repent, ye shall all likewise perish.”